I came to San Jose in 1996 to direct a play and one of the first things I got to do was go with Timothy and the cast to a welcoming party across the street from the theatre, hosted by Mona.  And what a welcome it was.  Mona loved the arts and she loved throwing a dinner party.  And she was so good at it!  Perceptive, articulate and oh-so-enthusiastic, conversation with her was a dizzying dive into theatre appreciation.  She made us all feel so good to be there.  For a new artist in a new town, someone like Mona is a godsend.  I was lucky to continue working at the wonderful San Jose Rep, luckier still to continue to enjoy Mona's beautiful mind and open heart for many years to come.  Missing her so!

Michael and I are so sad to lose Mona.  We still can't believe she has left this earth!  She was a life force.  And moved through the world eagerly taking it all in and celebrating it joyfully.  She was such a supporter of San Jose Rep for years and that is how I met her.  Her energetic enthusiasm was so inspiring!  We can never forget the great dinner parties she  and Shel would throw for us SJ Rep folks and celebrities such as Leigh and Geri Weimers.  She stimulatd fascinating conversations about art and community.  Mona really played a big role in creating the fabric of a strong artistic community.  She was always there to hail the artistic endeavor of the moment.   She even strongly recommended a play, The Kite Runner, to me, which we produced at SJ Rep and that eventually made it to Broadway.  She was smart and feisty and joyful.  AND she was a fearless traveler and we loved to trade tales of our travels...she didn't need a lot of luxury, she just loved the discovery of a foreign culture and its art and the adventure of it all.  
Michael and I REALLY miss her.  We send big condolences to her family and especially to Shel.  Timothy Near & Michael Butler

Mona was my friend for over 40 years. Rapunzels, fellow traveler, parties, and so supportive. She let me use her mom’s condo in Victoria numerous times.  Lately we just had car coffee together on occasion. I’d pick her up, we got drive thru coffee and could spend an hour or so together. My last conversation with Mona was for her to get better so we could have coffee again.

Those who comment here know her. Words don’t do her justice. To be a friend of Mona was everything.

My sincere condolences to Shel and the family. 

In tears, Dianne Kochenburg

Trident Society

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OBITUARY

Mona Palmer Onstead

November 26, 1932 – January 15, 2026

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