Marilyn "Marlene" Alice Couture

Marilyn Alice Couture was born Marilyn Alice Phelps on May 18, 1938 in San Rafael, California, the daughter of Thomas Phelps and Cortona Smith. To her sisters she was Dede. To the love of her life, she was Marlene — a name that came naturally from his French accent and stayed with her always.

Marlene grew up in Marin County, living in San Rafael and San Anselmo before her family moved to Richmond during her teenage years. As a young woman she worked in various administrative positions in San Francisco and attended UC Berkeley, where she intended to become a curator of Chinese art. She loved academic life and thrived in Berkeley’s intellectual environment. But she loved Raphael Couture more.

She and Raphael made a deliberate choice to put down roots in Santa Cruz County, believing it the right place to start and raise a family.

In 1965 she married Raphael Couture, an artist, gardener, and cook of remarkable gifts. While Raphael created an extraordinary home — growing food from a flourishing garden, sculpting, painting, and filling their life with beauty — Marlene kept the family provided for, becoming the breadwinner at a time when that was neither common nor easy for a woman. Theirs was a full and loving partnership, that sadly, was cut short. Raphael, intelligent, creative, kind, and handsome, was the love of her life. When he died of a brain tumor in 1979 at the age of 46, Marlene did not fall in love again. Out of love and out of need, she gathered herself and became both parents to their daughter — all while navigating the loss of the person she had built her life around. She simply carried him forward, and kept going.

Marlene joined the astronomy department at UC Santa Cruz as an administrative assistant and over 34 years rose to become its business office manager. She valued her work deeply — it kept her family provided for, offered extraordinary benefits, and gave her a work family that supported her through her greatest loss with grace and generosity.

She was tall, slender, and elegant, beautiful in the way that comes from both the outside and the inside together. She loved dry Chardonnay and rich Merlot, triple cream brie with crisp crackers and salami, the occasional bag of chips, and the French-inflected cooking her husband had perfected from their garden. Her favorite restaurant was Theo’s. She loved to swim, ride bikes, snowshoe with her sisters on beloved trips to Lake Tahoe, and take long walks on the beach.

Marlene was deeply curious about people — what made them tick, what they carried, what mattered to them. She loved good conversation, good books, and good food shared generously. Her humor was dry and precise, best appreciated in the intimate company of people she trusted. She was warm in the way that made people feel genuinely seen. At work and in life she was the person others turned to when they needed someone in their corner. She was that person quietly, consistently, and without being asked. She always wanted the best for people — and that never changed.

In her final years, even as vascular dementia took more of her with each passing month, Marlene’s warmth and generosity found their way through. Near the very end, when she could no longer speak or move her arms well or say her daughter’s name, she still found a way to offer what was on her plate. She never stopped sharing. As recently as January of this year she agreed without hesitation to a spontaneous road trip with her daughter, stopping for Girl Scout cookies and taking in the county she loved. In one tender moment near the end, a song from her childhood reached her — and brought out the childlike glee that lived underneath her sophistication right to the very end.

Marlene is survived by her daughter Camille, her son-in-law Andrew Carter, and her beloved granddaughter Madison — who arrived when Marlene was 67, a miracle her daughter had been told she would never have, and who brought Marlene a joy she hadn’t anticipated. She is also survived by her sisters Joan and Judy, many nieces and nephews, and many dear friends.

Remarkably, Marlene transitioned on April 10, 2026 at 2:33 in the morning — the same day and roughly the same hour as her husband Raphael, 47 years before.